God is my source

I believe that it is possible to live joyfully, that joy is something we can experience in our day-to-day lives. I believe that we don’t have to wait for joy to come along mysteriously but that we can ‘take’ joy. I am experimenting with believing that joy is the ‘new normal’. Of course, there are times when sorrow is appropriate but as a default – joy is possible.

While I believe that our Father God desires joy for our hearts, I believe also that there is an enemy who seeks to steal our joy. I am realising that I need to be aware of the fight that I am picking as I put my head out in the line of fire by writing a blog on joy. So I have taken to asking why when I am not feeling joy, pursuing an answer from God and His Word.

In the last few days I experienced a feeling that is quite familiar for me, a feeling that I have come to recognise as my confidence slipping from me. It’s an inner battle that I have fought from time to time and won, taking more ground as I go. It had been a while, but I thank God for awareness, or discernment, to see it coming and ask Him for help.

Usually as I feel my confidence slipping away I chase hard after it asking, “Where did I go wrong?” “What is wrong with me?” and, “Where is my joy?” But God is gracious and He snapped me out of this default response showing me how foolish it is for me to focus on myself, and how ensnared I can become chasing my own tail to reach what I can only find in Him.

I remembered the Word in James 4:7-8,
“Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.”

Sigh. Selah. What relief we have in Him. God is my source. Surely our joy comes from intimacy with our Heavenly Father.

That day was a great day. I took the car to school that day, and for the first time since Josiah started kindergarten we drove together there and back. He was so excited that we could do that – it was infectious, and I caught on as well.