Saying no to strivenness

Not sure how it's spelt but I think I just made it up so I don't think I can be corrected.

A few weeks ago I noticed how I can easily enslave myself to striving and drivenness. I came to recognise a pattern in my life, where given some time to myself I'd fill it up with a list of things I "had" to do. I'd get to the end of that time exhausted and think that what I really needed was to relax and get renewed. Drivenness took the joy out of things. I'd do something that I didn't really need to do because I thought I should. I'd struggle through with frustration and not enjoy it at all.

Strivenness is an awful motivator.

I came to a point one evening and said no to striving and being driven in those situations. I took it easy, happy not to get anything done particularly. I've since noticed that I've been more relaxed generally with the way I've used my time. I haven't felt subject to have-tos that really aren't. I thank God because I think He set me free from something in my heart.

This lack of contentment and joy, and a sense of striving and drivenness can mess with our hearts. I can think of many times I have served others from this place and really I have been searching for some kind of fulfillment in my heart. Where being fulfilled in my Father's love I can do things out of the overflow of His life, from my heart.

I have recently been again impressed by Jesus and the way He seemed to be so secure and so different to our own culture of drivenness. He limited His time with the crowd so that He could spend time on His own with Father God. He didn't do anything to promote Himself or drum up business - He actively sought to keep many miracles quiet. Jesus didn't worry about impressing people or building momentum in His ministry. No strivenness there at all.

Any thoughts?